Life After Forty

Infertility After Forty, Part 2

December 29, 2021 Staci A/Dr.Huber Season 1 Episode 3
Transcript

08:01:46:13 - 08:01:14:15
Unknown
So they're male infertility, male reproductive, female infertility, female reproductive and understanding, you know, fertility, understanding, infertility, treatment options, surgical treatments, intrauterine insemination, assisted reproductive technology. Well, it's a lot going on here. There is an illustration of the female anatomy.

08:01:05:15 - 08:00:22:18
Unknown
So we got to the menstrual cycle. So that cause of infertility in women in inflamed fallopian tube, uterine fibroids, reduced cervical mucus, endometriosis and cervical stenosis close to the cervix. Hormonal and ovulation factors, probably since the old PCOS is what we have primary ovary ovarian insufficiency hyper.

08:00:21:12 - 09:59:48:02
Unknown
But, you know, in just a few minutes, OK, you. Select causes infertility in women, inflamed fallopian tube, uterine fibroids. Reduce cervical mucus. Intro music, endometriosis. Endometriosis, cervical stenosis. Up closure of the cervix. Then there are hormonal and ovulation factors.

09:59:45:11 - 09:59:01:22
Unknown
Probably 60 Taliban, mm hmm. In primary ovarian insufficiency hyper probe led to mania, other endo trends seen and indoctrinate disorders aging in males. Yeah, yeah. And the male anatomy. Testicles. Penis gland. Bladder. Then the. And after looking at all this penis in vagina soup, male infertility can be really good and healthy sperm not produce.

09:58:58:27 - 09:58:31:05
Unknown
Sperm cannot travel through their reproductive system, sperm count, low sperm do not function correctly, and the sperm count lower than 15 million milliliters in a single ejaculation may signal infertility conditions that affect sperm foundation chromosome defects, the disorder, certain diseases, overproduction of prolactin injury to other testicles.

09:58:30:06 - 09:57:51:04
Unknown
The epidemic merits hormone imbalance antibodies one on the scene, undescended testicle, and there are more things that affect the male DNA. Do the female very coding conditions that affect the sperm transportation mean in a railroad system? Retrograde ejaculation blockages take in semen lack of vast difference erectile dysfunction, some medication and it is inflammation of the testicles.

09:57:49:18 - 09:57:34:16
Unknown
Wow. There are more things that affect the DOS than they do. Lifestyle factors Drug use is something. It's got a hold of the anatomy. Yeah, you see, that's why that's why I left. I all this always out, you know?

09:57:34:16 - 09:57:17:24
Unknown
Yeah, guys, this is poly. Hey, poly poly is one of our fourth year LSU medical students. Oh yeah, I'm joking with me this month. She has. She's going to be applying to join residency programs around the country who is currently doing OK.

09:57:16:26 - 09:56:57:18
Unknown
She's learning the world of women's health and fertility medicine for me this month. So, oh, got to get a good look at her. Hmm. Thank you. So, you know, this got was kind of brief and piling on on where we have been, we'll talk a little bit about where we are and then ultimately we want to go

09:56:57:12 - 09:56:40:21
Unknown
, OK, before we begin. Can I record this conversation? Yes, sir. All right. Read me full disclosure. She started the podcast. This is part of our therapy sessions on the podcast today. We just did a infertility. We just spoke on it prior to coming here, so we going to do a Part two and probably cry later on.

09:56:40:04 - 09:56:24:06
Unknown
Oh, but with that just to help the therapeutic process, I think that's terrific. OK, so let's start. You know, I want to I'd like to start by asking you when you're ready. Oh, go ahead. How are you doing today?

09:56:24:06 - 09:56:07:11
Unknown
I'm OK today. I thought it was going to be hard to come here. Um, I warn everybody if I were a little weird, but this is this. This has a lot to do with your personality. So when you know you're coming to a safe place, I think I'm probably still going.

09:56:07:00 - 09:55:46:25
Unknown
It's OK, but I don't mind that you know what I can when you come into a safe place and you know you're dealing with a person who is very transparent and caring. It makes it easier. Yeah. Today we kind of reflected on the conversation of the journey twelve years ago, plus year on how it just the epiphany

09:55:46:25 - 09:55:31:11
Unknown
was. We didn't have good doctors, we didn't have good specialists. And, you know, we reflected during the conversation on how immediately your analogy to the Superdome broke it down into the simplistic stuff. We're not going to jump into IVF.

09:55:30:28 - 09:55:13:26
Unknown
We're going to go from here to there and see what we can do. And I think that's part of the reason we're back because if we're comfortable, if we understood the first time it, it happened immediately. Although it was a chemical pregnancy, the second time it occurred again.

09:55:12:10 - 09:54:52:11
Unknown
And unfortunately, we did lose the baby. But upon our journey of just conversion since then and just being honest with one another, like in today's session in conversation, it was like Dr. Hubert is one of the one of the best in a city like and for anybody because we want to speak to an audience of this issue

09:54:52:00 - 09:54:40:12
Unknown
. Anybody going through infertility, whether male and are female, is best to have someone that you feel comfortable with. More importantly, because if we would have had you twelve years ago, we probably would have had a live with love you.

09:54:40:11 - 09:54:20:24
Unknown
Yeah, probably a twelve year old because of just not only a bedside manner, but even a whole offices of love and support of everybody that comes into this clinic. It still reflect upon the cheering and having come back and show us the kid of and twelve years ago, it wasn't that it's put your money on a dress

09:54:20:24 - 09:54:04:17
Unknown
and get on out. It was a cold or the cold experience day put us aside for twelve years. And so I mean, I've been better slowly and aggressively every day. I have a therapist that I talk to there with now.

09:54:04:13 - 09:53:46:20
Unknown
Great. So I'm just. I got with him yesterday, I told him I was yesterday, so it was something he meant to do on my therapy session. The I'm just I'm in the the angry phase right now. Like more of I don't understand how we got this far.

09:53:45:27 - 09:53:33:25
Unknown
And then it's just gone in the day. Like, that's kind of where my anger is. I just think that that's what my mind is wrapping around, like the whole understanding this and I could have done differently that he could have done differently.

09:53:33:25 - 09:53:19:29
Unknown
It happened. And I can't I have to just kind of just let my feelings be the way they feel when they kind of just get there. So that's why me and the purpose of both coming back to you is I've already been on my gynecologist.

09:53:18:27 - 09:53:03:17
Unknown
She's read through my chart and her of what she sees as just like more of because my cervix evolve. And that's what it was. So, so fetus was baby was just like baby was fully intact for good. Great.

09:53:03:16 - 09:52:50:17
Unknown
It took them almost 20 minutes to open esthetic. Yeah, that's how intact it was. The placenta was very cervix open. And then did you go into labor or yeah. So I didn't know it was labor. So I just I just literally woke up.

09:52:50:13 - 09:52:39:25
Unknown
I didn't have any pain on woke up. And when I got up, it's like my water broke. In a sense, I didn't know that. I was like, Okay, I know this thing's supposed to be happening. I know something's happening.

09:52:39:25 - 09:52:26:00
Unknown
But I wasn't in any pain, so I called him. He got into the emergency room and then like 30 minutes after that and I started to feel like sleeping, but nothing really major. I was just bleeding. Sounds like incompetent cervix, right?

09:52:26:00 - 09:52:09:16
Unknown
So it sounds like something that you they would recommend that you do a stitch or so close your collage between eleven and 13, maybe 14 weeks, probably 1113. Yeah. But then also injectable progesterone, 17 hydroxy progesterone every every week is something that you may want to consider.

09:52:09:11 - 09:51:47:07
Unknown
Okay, so you know the the good news here is that I think you over you still have what it takes. Mm hmm. Right. And and look, I think the chances are we'll be blessed with the ability to if we can get you ovulate, if we can get the sperm where it belongs, when it belongs there, we've got

09:51:47:07 - 09:51:34:27
Unknown
it. We've got a pretty good shot here. Now do you know if have you met with Joy Biggio or have you met with any of those maternal fetal medicine docs? So my doctor? That's correct. She wants me to, she said.

09:51:34:27 - 09:51:19:07
Unknown
Once I met with you, then she would go to my appointments to go down and meet with them just to make sure they're they're terrific. So. So Joey Biggio and will I think we'll williams his name. There's two, there's two or three my friends over there and just get him with any of them.

09:51:19:03 - 09:51:02:13
Unknown
OK. Joey is kind of the head of all of it all, and OK. He trained with one of the same guys that I trained with. He was at UAB and I trained with him at Brown. So we have some common mentoring in between each other.

09:51:02:13 - 09:50:46:03
Unknown
But the the other one Will Williams, I think his last name is I know them too very well. Any of those MFM dogs, maternal-fetal medicine dogs, they're going to weigh in and they're going to give you their opinion and the data driven discussion on second trimester obstetrics.

09:50:45:22 - 09:50:32:03
Unknown
So I'm a first trimester obstetrician. Mm hmm. Right. I see you now. I'll see you when you're ovulating and get you pregnant. Get you to nine, ten weeks. Right? And then we get you back over to Gillespie or Markowitz.

09:50:30:29 - 09:50:15:06
Unknown
And and Mepham also plays a role there. So Sherri Longo is another doc that's over there now. They they are the ones that would help put this clause in and put that stitch in. Oh, come on. On a personal note, I ask, how you doing?

09:50:15:06 - 09:50:01:08
Unknown
And I ask, you know, have y'all going to therapy together? And have you ever tried going together to like a couples session? We have, you know, we haven't. But the way my crazy is. I pretty much talk to my Typekit loves you, man.

09:50:01:04 - 09:49:45:14
Unknown
Yeah, I talk to everybody about it, though, and I'm I'm a little bit more like I have helped her before her therapist got to her because I recognize certain signs in our force that are Converse. You're not just going to sit here and wallow in misery.

09:49:45:13 - 09:49:30:19
Unknown
I need to know. And through those conversations, it's actually helped me understand her, her pain more because from a male's perspective, I'm sitting up there looking at it as a miscarriage. No, it was layers. It was being pregnant.

09:49:30:19 - 09:49:17:26
Unknown
It was talking instead of baby. It was missing the kick and missing the nausea. So now I understand what those levels of depression comes in when she said it's any number of different things that trigger when she would cry.

09:49:17:12 - 09:49:00:25
Unknown
And now that I was having her communicate that with me, I can be a little bit more understanding. But I'm not shying away from the incident. Either is just there through talking. I'm tell you my backup because we told her listeners on our record in her future listeners.

09:48:59:00 - 09:48:46:06
Unknown
The day after the miscarriage, we had a winning rehearsal in our space and a young lady. I had a call on my cell phone and I was telling her that my wife isn't going to make it. It's going to be one of her first, first planners or whatnot.

09:48:46:06 - 09:48:34:28
Unknown
I want a resistance. I got there and she could see that something was wrong, so I pulled him aside to say, Look, I just had a miscarriage last night, just saw him in all of this now just had a miscarriage last night.

09:48:34:15 - 09:48:16:19
Unknown
Oh, pretty much. That's why I called you for my phone. I wanted you to know you still don't get to rehearsal. She's going to take care of you. She told me. She said, I apologize. I'm sorry to hear that, but I had one years ago and ultimately, you know, was meant to be is meant to be.

09:48:16:13 - 09:47:58:00
Unknown
But I have two kids now, so don't allow that one. Just one incident to, you know, dictate your mindset. Don't be afraid to try again. And I felt so much comfort like immediately total stranger. All you are is a client to me, but because I allowed myself to be vulnerable with her.

09:47:57:18 - 09:47:38:16
Unknown
She shared her pain and that commonality made me feel good, and I've been doing it ever since. So my therapy has really been coming from just speaking my truth. And it's crazy because we both have found because we end up announcing it to all of our clients on in all of our businesses.

09:47:38:12 - 09:47:15:23
Unknown
Because the day before the day, the day that we actually had a miscarriage, we had already planned to announce the next date. Uglier day, October first. We've also had everybody else on my looking for good. We went through, you know, as far as the I barely just got my results back there Wednesday from my um, what is

09:47:15:23 - 09:47:04:29
Unknown
the test the turning point? Yes. Yes, she didn't, really, because we have been waiting for like two weeks and I got that. She was like, Look, let me go down and see what's going on because you should, you shouldn't take the ball.

09:47:04:15 - 09:46:52:01
Unknown
So she had really just totally forgot about that Wednesday and was like, Oh, he's perfectly fine, you're perfectly good. I'll see you. Assholes will think, which is my next appointment. And then the next day I had a miscarriage was like, So it was on emotion.

09:46:52:01 - 09:46:34:06
Unknown
All of that just kind of just compounded the pain of it all like this just because it just came out the blue. Like, no, no spotting, no pain or nothing, just you just came out of the blue. And that's why I was like, I needed to meet with our doctors and just kind of understand, understand, make sure

09:46:34:06 - 09:46:17:16
Unknown
that I need to do this again. And that, you know, we get to ask you just to make sure we're good and go physically in the therapist kick that there became when I made a conscious decision to tell her, we need to at least let everybody know what happened, because the next weekend after the.

09:46:17:07 - 09:46:00:11
Unknown
Ed, we had three weddings in a row, and let's just say we both were zombies. And for my clients to see us not being professional in attire, but we were there, I was like, I told them of apology, so I apologize to them via email phone call.

09:46:00:05 - 09:45:44:04
Unknown
But then we made the video and let everybody else doing. Those same clients was like, Oh my God, I did not know that Derrida and other people started to, like, call in them and email their stories, and I have no idea who they are.

09:45:44:02 - 09:45:31:01
Unknown
Yeah, it's just kind of made it therapeutic for us, but it kind of let us know because even one of my clients, she was like, Yeah, I was. I had my fallopian tubes removed. They told me I never get pregnant.

09:45:31:01 - 09:45:15:29
Unknown
I had to go through the procedure to get pregnant because of my fallopian tubes removed. And when she went to go get IVF going to find out she was five months pregnant, five weeks pregnant. So she was like, you know, she had multiple miscarriages prior to that.

09:45:15:17 - 09:45:00:25
Unknown
So it was kind of like when I talked to her, I was like, It's amazing how this little weird club we have now it's talking to other people is giving us comfort, and other people are like wishing they would have done what we did tell others because they're saying, young lady.

09:45:00:25 - 09:44:48:12
Unknown
She says she had to be on suicide watch due to the fact that she didn't tell nobody and people anticipated her absence being that she had a baby. So she was asking her about that and she just fell into deeper and deeper depression because of that.

09:44:47:26 - 09:44:29:12
Unknown
So with me, that's been part of why I feel you guys believe in fate after anyone from a rocky world for a second here. So this is pretty cool. I'm in your club. Yeah, my wife and I lost a baby at 22 weeks.

09:44:29:07 - 09:44:12:11
Unknown
Oh, nice delivery option on my first day of medical school. Oh wow. So I'm in the yeah, unfortunately, club. Unfortunately, right now we buried our first baby. Yeah, because it was over 20, 20 weeks. So. Oh wow. But then we got pregnant again.

09:44:11:27 - 09:43:51:01
Unknown
They put us your closet and mine did the whole nine yards with progesterone. That was in 2008 2009. You're pregnant again. I'm a first year medical student. Still, you talk about crazy thinking about, um, about whether or not this is going to go through.

09:43:50:06 - 09:43:30:21
Unknown
Well, Lauren gets to they put the clause in at like twelve or 13 weeks. We get home. She's on bed rest around 26 weeks. She starts having contractions. I go in. They have to cut her stitch. Oh man, my little girl, who's now twelve, was delivered around 2:00 in the morning.

09:43:30:21 - 09:43:12:09
Unknown
And you know who? Who delivered her to it? Wow, wow. But the reason I bring that up is because I know what you're feeling, right? And I I mean, you can't you don't meet many people that know what you're feeling, right?

09:43:12:08 - 09:42:55:13
Unknown
I've seen the hurt. I know what you hurt feels like you are so passionate about what you do. Yeah, I know what you hurt feels like. I watched my wife, who is a very, very strong woman, had strong type a, you name it.

09:42:55:09 - 09:42:35:24
Unknown
I watched her for two weeks not be able to go to bed and I couldn't do anything. I try and I try try to get her to get up and move, and she wanted her baby. Yeah, and it's crazy, and all the friends were pregnant almost said I didn't want to see him almost.

09:42:35:14 - 09:42:25:23
Unknown
And I and I and we did that at first too, and I was I changed my mind quickly. Thank you. That I was there because I definitely know what we did. We did. We didn't. We didn't know the sex, so we didn't.

09:42:25:23 - 09:42:10:26
Unknown
Even with the 21 thing we didn't want to do, we want to know. I'm glad you ended up because I think that would be something that you regret it. Yes. Yeah, we got I got a picture on my phone and actually, you know, see this little box with like some pictures and some, yeah, it's happening pretty long

09:42:10:26 - 09:41:58:10
Unknown
. Yeah, yeah. His name is Montana Hendricks. Yeah, so that so this it was a boy. So, yeah, but I'm glad that I did it because I had on that. I would be I would not be able to talk right now.

09:41:58:10 - 09:41:46:02
Unknown
Probably, yeah. And I think a lot of people that we've like that associate kind of letting us know that I wish I would have seen my baby. Yes. Like when he heard us say that they still wish upon and their regret.

09:41:46:02 - 09:41:35:19
Unknown
We we waited a day we did. We did to get into. It was a day. Yeah, yeah. And and came the conclusion that we think it's what was best because I had a do and see that same night.

09:41:35:15 - 09:41:21:10
Unknown
So again, it is. It's really it's really the thing driven by it because the doctor there that was on duty that night in the hospital, I was the only person, the only patient on labor and delivery in the hospital.

09:41:21:07 - 09:41:07:27
Unknown
Who was who was the doctor. Dr. Eubanks, OK. And she was at home and they called her and say, you know, I had already had a miscarriage, so she really didn't have a reason to be there. It was just, you know, she will come in the morning, you know, shift was over.

09:41:07:16 - 09:40:47:07
Unknown
But she says she was in her bed, literally, you know, and for the night was something saying, get up and go put my face on his patients feet. So she got about a b team saw me. And when she checked me, she said, OK, you're not leaving me more of this is tissue and we're doing it easy

09:40:47:07 - 09:40:28:24
Unknown
on you right now. Yeah, like, I'm now waiting another minute to do this. So even though she was awesome, the labor that there was, that was awesome. But I think just from it, it just kind of easy. Let me let me see, let me see my baby and I'm going to go for you.

09:40:28:16 - 09:40:07:10
Unknown
Yeah, I'm glad you did, too. We at first we're like, It's just going to hurt too much. And then it was very peaceful. Was it because you look like he knows his big nose and they're just like, literally, he was like, Oh, you would see if the other guy, you barely see his nose and you know.

09:40:06:15 - 09:39:55:18
Unknown
And also for me during night, because she end up having him in the emergency room bathroom, and that was so hard. But yeah, that was terrible. But no, just the staff in general, but was hard, the emergency room down there.

09:39:55:17 - 09:39:43:08
Unknown
They were horrible. So I was able to be there right after she she had him. I was able to actually like, take a glance, and I saw that everything was intact. But then it's like, Let's get her upstairs.

09:39:42:14 - 09:39:23:14
Unknown
And then when I was, the comfort came because I'm like, we've learned since then. I know he never took a breath because the sack was so intact. It was. It was no pain. No anything I've been. And I tell people I've been, if you've never been in nick, you if you want to understand what pain is for

09:39:23:14 - 09:39:04:27
Unknown
a parent and a burden going, Nick, you don't see what those parents are sitting there. I've been there. I've been there with family, with their kids. one of my daughters was there for four days because a biblical call was wrapped around a diagnosis bed as hell now, but it's 80 minutes of 80 days with Mary our second

09:39:04:27 - 09:38:49:03
Unknown
baby, the second. Yes, that is a you'd never freakin know. And now, boy. 18, whatever our nephew is. My assumed I was on 28 weeks, twelve going on 18. I mean, fast track 18, right? If he's at a faster rate.

09:38:48:19 - 09:38:34:13
Unknown
But if you know that that level of stress during those days and that just being in that hospital, you living in a hospital is just nothing. But I understood that in the fact that he didn't have to go through it and we didn't have to go through it and lose out.

09:38:33:20 - 09:38:18:16
Unknown
I'm comfortable with that because I know the pain and the stress could have been a whole lot worse. Holding on hope at that point. So it's a lot of different factors that really keep me calm and make me comfortable due to the fact that I know it could have been what it could have.

09:38:18:16 - 09:38:03:05
Unknown
I could have lost hurt. I could have lost him as well. It was. It's a lot. So with that, it's kind of like, OK, I'm good. And the fact from a male's perspective, I'm able to communicate to other men, that is not.

09:38:03:04 - 09:37:49:17
Unknown
She had a miscarriage. We had a miscarriage and the guy who works on my AC unit, and it was having a conversation with him come to find out his wife had a miscarriage years ago. They have a little girl now 23 years old, but he never talked to her about it.

09:37:49:02 - 09:37:35:18
Unknown
Not one time and I told him to. And he came back, probably about two weeks afterwards. He was right. Mike was right. She still holds on to a little bit of that pain, and I never knew I said yes, yeah, she's been battling.

09:37:35:13 - 09:37:24:23
Unknown
And I said, you would never know if you don't ask. But you know, it is like, he said, your wife is type a strong just any other name, like she's holding on to that hurt and she's going to relive it consistently.

09:37:23:25 - 09:37:10:18
Unknown
But he was very thankful that I had that conversation with him. So I've been finding real comfort in therapy in that I really had good. I asked about you because many times what I tried at first was I was this what I call a full rock.

09:37:09:22 - 09:37:00:00
Unknown
And I was so strong, so strong. Villain got to get a rough guy to get her move and got to do this kind of thing. I got to get her child back in this room and inside you were going through a disaster.

09:36:59:25 - 09:36:45:25
Unknown
Yeah, no. I let my now I let. It was where when you say faith, oh, there was a church that lost their their their their church. And he came to me and it was like, Can we utilize your building for a couple of weeks?

09:36:45:15 - 09:36:32:23
Unknown
I was like, Look, I got these weeks, and this is the first week. The second week was Will and we lost the baby. And I said outside and it was just heavy on my heart and my spirit, and I love him by the hole it air.

09:36:32:14 - 09:36:20:26
Unknown
I walked outside, I took a GoPro and I recorded an ugly cry. And I spoke my truth and I spoke my heart. And I looked up at the sky, and I've been smiling ever since I let it out.

09:36:20:15 - 09:36:07:06
Unknown
I wasn't about to hold it in. I let the snot roll, the tears and everything, you know, and I came back and I explained to her, this is what helped me just never being able to speak it out loud, acknowledge it.

09:36:06:27 - 09:35:50:21
Unknown
And I know we're two different people. But there was an outlet that she could have done. She does writing so, you know, being able to hold one another accountable to get past it and not allow us to lie for me, I can be strong, but at the end of the day, I don't have a problem, be vulnerable

09:35:50:03 - 09:35:35:11
Unknown
. So I'm not about to let this kill me and I'm not gonna allow it to kill her. And I'll tell you from personal experience every day on every year, on that day for the first two, four, six years.

09:35:35:03 - 09:35:19:15
Unknown
Mm hmm. My wife her, I mean, I hurt. But like, I again, that folk rock man. So I. The time improves the feeling that's the right word, because I mean, people are telling me their time is going to heal.

09:35:19:14 - 09:35:04:01
Unknown
I don't know if it is the right word. No improvement, definitely the huge improvement. I hurt less every year. That is the right word in her left right. And then it'll be six weeks or more. Fresh sticks. That's right.

09:35:03:28 - 09:34:48:01
Unknown
So so my my question was maybe, you know, because never, not once. Even the day that it happened the next day and never, not once said I felt that I would try again, like it was never there. It was always going to be OK.

09:34:47:18 - 09:34:34:24
Unknown
Here we go. We want to target. Yeah. So my I guess my question was because I've been dubious. You've been too busy, body wise. Does that change anything the we don't do? We have to go to the whole world like blow.

09:34:34:24 - 09:34:18:29
Unknown
We're getting back to that process. That was my I don't know where to go. You know, I don't know what's the next step. Step is, I would, you know, certainly after a D and C, I would give yourself at least six to eight weeks to and try to regulate yourself.

09:34:18:28 - 09:34:06:08
Unknown
And you haven't had a period in like two, two to three weeks from now. I'd get in and do an ultrasound a little bit, a little bit of blood work just to make see what your hormones are. But like, do you need to do all your virals and shit like that?

09:34:06:07 - 09:33:48:26
Unknown
Oh, OK, OK. Again, that's why we're here. Didn't really know what was the next step we were going to say, but I haven't had this cycle here, really. And you know, if you are a regular cycler before of all this and I would say, yeah, way to year period comes back, but you might be waiting till Christmas

09:33:48:21 - 09:33:34:24
Unknown
. All right. So let's let's see what things look like in the next two weeks or so. OK, and then I'll get you in for bloodwork and an ultrasound. The blood work. What I'm looking for is your estrogen level, your ultrasound.

09:33:34:24 - 09:33:20:18
Unknown
What I'm looking for is to see if you know what the uterus looks like and to see what the ovaries look like. If you're starting to make an egg and we leave you alone, we say, All right, that's the way we'll get running with the next cycle.

09:33:20:17 - 09:33:11:18
Unknown
Okay? If you're not making an egg and it looks like, Oh, there, that's a little that's that stays as ovaries, you got two eggs all over the place and you're just not going to do it on your own.

09:33:10:23 - 09:32:52:24
Unknown
Nope, it's not broke. Don't fix. So I'll get you back on something like letrozole make you ovulate, right? HQ trigger. Are you all right? Okay. Okay. So you know, I would I would give yourself a 16 week loss with a Danny and give yourself at least a good eight weeks.

09:32:52:19 - 09:32:38:12
Unknown
Yeah, right? two or three months, something like that. Okay. By the time I actually get you pregnant and depends on on what you're endometrial with, the lining looks like I might bring down a period with Provera. first will be like two weeks of progesterone make you have a period.

09:32:38:12 - 09:32:24:14
Unknown
And then we hit the ground running. The surge had a period, right? Okay. Yeah. The other thing is, I don't think you paid HQ level is still elevated, but what happens after a pregnancy is that your baby to age CG is was probably really high.

09:32:24:14 - 09:32:09:08
Unknown
At 16 weeks, it was 56,000. Right. And once they removed everything, it starts to plummet. Right. But what you have to remember is it might have taken two to four weeks for it to plummet and then it takes you two to five weeks to modulate.

09:32:08:25 - 09:31:54:20
Unknown
So you're still well within that window of of when things went. When were I would want I wouldn't want you to get pregnant any sooner than, like three months, OK? Right, right, right. But we can at least start the primary might take me.

09:31:54:14 - 09:31:37:23
Unknown
Oh, wow. Yeah, from here might take me through that third month to get you there. So I'm in right. I'm in you. Let me know how you know how quickly or how slow. I mean this in two weeks, you may say, you know what I thought about it.

09:31:37:23 - 09:31:26:15
Unknown
We're just not ready yet. Let's come back after the first of the year and then we hit the ground running. But mentally, that's kind of where I was. I'm me. I told her that we need to give ourselves a mental break, give yourself a physical break.

09:31:26:11 - 09:31:14:04
Unknown
Yeah, we need to at least get through that in order just so we're clear, not just jump on the horse immediately. Yeah, that's what the key was to me. Without you, without, you know, Dr. G. Me, would you?

09:31:13:18 - 09:30:56:06
Unknown
And then I know the me with the fetal, the fetal and maternal department. And then at that point, then we would, you know, we can make the decision on what to look for. So when was that? When was the the DNC that said the same date, September 30th, September 30th?

09:30:56:06 - 09:30:44:03
Unknown
OK, yeah. So if you haven't had a period by the first then year, then that's sometime ago digging for and figuring out what's the deal, OK? Right. But do not rush back into this. No, I'm gonna be here for the hour.

09:30:44:03 - 09:30:28:20
Unknown
But there was right and I thought this was finest for maybe 25 to 5050 with the suture. Your wife really was just like in the cloud. Now she had, I mean, she was sleeping. There's a couple of different ways you could do it instead of decides how to do that.

09:30:28:17 - 09:30:13:09
Unknown
You can do the shoot a little spinal where you numb from weight, from the waist, disarming during the whole pregnancy. I have to assume after she got the survivor's washing on babies she was, but you saw a light coat like exactly because I can lose.

09:30:13:09 - 09:29:58:24
Unknown
I mean, you could still get stuff around. But she wasn't running away now. She went on her feet all the time. Yeah, but you got to live. Yeah. You know, you got to live. So she yeah, she she did.

09:29:58:23 - 09:29:45:00
Unknown
You know, she was up with movement. She wasn't just like, fly the whole time. Now, after the first clash with Frankie I, our first little girl, Lauren went in for one of her appointments and they saw that her cervix was shortening.

09:29:45:00 - 09:29:31:18
Unknown
So they watched her again brought her in. And that's really like, no. Longo's and my friend brought her back to the operating room and put us in a closet, and two or three weeks later is when she just started having contractions about 22 weeks then.

09:29:31:02 - 09:29:09:20
Unknown
And yeah, delivered a baby that was just non-viable, non-viable. Through this, her collage started, you know, tore through the cervix through this way of going on 18 now and then there. And the second one. Oh yeah, now after that, Frankie was our first man and you talk about how to take your boy.

09:29:08:15 - 09:28:52:02
Unknown
She had to be there for that 26 weeks and it was up and down and down for like six weeks. I think I burned every candle at Saint Edward Confessor Church that within six weeks, every time I leave that nick, you and I try to be spiritual.

09:28:52:02 - 09:28:38:26
Unknown
But man, I'm a realist and I didn't give a shit. I was going to cash in every chip. I was going to pray to every God that there could have possibly gone right. And it works right. And now she's been through more.

09:28:38:25 - 09:28:20:00
Unknown
She was. She's such a great. She's great, but she's a mother. You're so strong. She is going to pay off well, if he goes there, R-Ohio now, and I thank you for sharing. Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. So think you guys have my cell?

09:28:20:00 - 09:28:03:15
Unknown
Yeah. I don't want to sit here today. I don't because you like, you know what? So it's just another step, and we want to just kind of, you know, check all of our boxes and be able to make some decisions.

09:28:02:27 - 09:27:44:21
Unknown
And this for you to look right, you know, anything we talk about separately will be confidential. I know that I've been there, done that. I. You know, you lose a piece of your soul. Yeah, that is the best way to describe that.

09:27:44:20 - 09:27:26:06
Unknown
So if he it, it gets better, it gets better. And you know me talk and you're probably the 10th or 12th couple in the last five years that I've, you know, they were in that club. Yeah, Columbia, where if you wish on anyone?

09:27:26:01 - 09:27:12:17
Unknown
No, no, you weren't. I tell people, it's not like you walk around with a shirt that says this is the pain of a scar on my heart right here. For somebody else to look at you and say, I know exactly what you're going through is is it's a secret society.

09:27:12:17 - 09:26:59:15
Unknown
Nobody wants to be affordable and it's for people that have not been through it. It's really hard to describe the pain. Mm hmm. And I can look at you and I know, you know, that's all I admits is I've never I've always heard about my life.

09:26:59:07 - 09:26:42:10
Unknown
What people can describe it like your heart breaking or like or like being or dying of a broken heart. I guess the best way I can describe it, like my heart is broken. That's what hurts. You know, my wife for the first few weeks when she was just since he was her boss, she just kept saying, Why

09:26:42:10 - 09:26:18:17
Unknown
me? Like why? And I never asked that question. It was never why. It was always like, You know, I just don't understand. Yeah, like, yeah, that's that's my life. I just don't understand. Like, I get this far. And then so I guess that's why you've got well, I'll tell you this to give you a second chance.

09:26:18:17 - 09:26:04:27
Unknown
You've got a great team. Yeah, you've got a great OBGYN. You're going to meet with some great maternal fetal medicine dogs. And I think you know that I'm going to give you every shot that I can get. And that's another reason I feel comfortable.

09:26:04:17 - 09:25:51:18
Unknown
It's, uh, you know, I'm strong as well. one of the things that gave me comfort during the whole process in the beginning, actually, right, as the doctor told us, You don't know, miss, you're going to have a miscarriage.

09:25:51:17 - 09:25:31:28
Unknown
Yeah, she's, you know, she's there. You miscarried right now. You're miscarry right now. What are the things that she also came back was it sounded like a non cervical. Like, I heard the terminologies I heard. I explained that this is what it looks like you had, which comes to find out with the cervix opening up.

09:25:31:08 - 09:25:12:17
Unknown
But she said the solution is an actual suture. Now, of course, we're both crying, but it also sounded as from personal experience. She had that as well because she was in tears. She was in tears delivery. The thing about the emergency room that was that was comforting was that particular factor.

09:25:12:17 - 09:25:00:10
Unknown
But what happened was in the midst of all of that, she went home. It sounded sweet home because she is a shift change, or she just couldn't take it because she's been there. And then the next doctor that came in was a complete dick.

09:25:00:02 - 09:24:42:19
Unknown
But yeah, she gave a cause and effect. She said, this is the cause, but here's a solution. And she said that and I always held on to that. And when I started, when Dr. Jean told us yes, to suture because now we know what the need to do, and I was telling her during this whole, you know

09:24:42:19 - 09:24:30:22
Unknown
why, why? Why I was like, Well, nobody knows what the body is going to do until it does it by. I mean, unfortunately, you can't put stitches in that regard. Yes, because this is already at the end of the day.

09:24:30:18 - 09:24:08:26
Unknown
We now know your body does this properly. So what's the result, Barish? That's what is going to be OK. So now that we get those confirmations and affirmations, I'm going to just plan accordingly. Yeah, you guys, you guys, you know, rest, relax.

09:24:08:26 - 09:23:57:10
Unknown
He will not rest, right? Because I know you are going to be all workaholics, but we are. And as long as we can, because I really didn't have a chance, I told him I have a chance to grieve because I miscarried on my birthday.

09:23:57:01 - 09:23:46:06
Unknown
I went to work on a Friday. I have been working ever since. I literally know have been working so that the holidays get through. Oh, you know what your period looks like? You call me, I'll get you in the week.

09:23:46:06 - 09:23:30:11
Unknown
You want to get out. Fitchett So yeah, we're going to be the Adobe. Then that's the planned Christmas week is two weeks off. Nobody talked to us, so I just finished that bottle of how what was I don't like cigar smoke cigars.

09:23:30:11 - 09:23:14:05
Unknown
It's a bad habit, but that's OK that it was like a cigar brandy. The brandy went off. Yeah, I got everyone from across the aisle. I'm hoping he'll enjoy this. Yeah. And then I also took the tequila. I gave you a bingo.

09:23:13:13 - 09:23:01:11
Unknown
Yeah, I looked at that with the bottom line, so I said I never had this one. But you deserve if you don't smoke cigars. The way that this guy described is one it's called FERPA. And yeah, it was.

09:23:01:09 - 09:22:47:00
Unknown
I still got it. I still got the name of it. I have. I'm drinking the bottle as we speak. I actually had. We had some. I turned 41 on one Sunday. Yeah, Sunday. Okay, now part of the. So he's part of the parking lot for your birthday.

09:22:46:09 - 09:22:31:04
Unknown
Oh, don't you? Oh, and I thought the defense was supposed to be our strong suit this year, man, it would have been me. I mean, you're really, you know, PJ well, it was just about to play. He just it just literally was just a good through.

09:22:31:00 - 09:22:19:23
Unknown
I felt like, well, that and I I felt like I was watching the Minnesota Vikings game again this year and the NFC Championship. So just a bad matchup. They got a big, big, tight in on a little guy.

09:22:19:17 - 09:22:06:20
Unknown
And then, yeah, frickin Atlanta man, we should have been. Yeah. But look, our offense didn't do anything the first half we lost that game. And then in the beginning, yeah, yeah, the receivers just kept dropping the ball. They just kept dropping everything.

09:22:06:11 - 09:21:47:29
Unknown
So but the name of the podcast is actually life after 40. No kidding. Yeah. Yes, I am. And for my 41st birthday, smoke cigars and drink a big glass and all of that of that drop and it's called, it's delicious.

09:21:47:11 - 09:21:30:08
Unknown
I would drink it up on special occasions. OK? I've never had it. It's quite good. That's great. I bought him a bottle. I never you never ran in a tequila. I seen that when we was on vacation for my 40th birthday in Arizona.

09:21:29:21 - 09:21:12:07
Unknown
That was at a resort that we were in in Scottsdale. They had all those bottles. Yeah, and everybody loved that. Yes, good stuff. I've seen, you know, total wines since then. Yeah, it's a it's a really they were like, this is one of the best agave tequilas on the market by far.

09:21:12:00 - 09:20:59:09
Unknown
We have to go. We can be OK. I mean, I have to admit. Look, I figure this is going to I thought I gave you 45 minutes, so we only had we're only up to like 40 now. But look, we started laughing.

09:20:58:14 - 09:20:46:17
Unknown
Listen, you call me when you're ready. And if you if you don't know if you're ready, you call me. OK, you talk a little bit more. We sit down. We figure it out. But Jesse, you know, from my end, I think it's going be pretty straightforward.

09:20:46:08 - 09:20:37:03
Unknown
OK, may evolve. That ultrasound may involve a little blood work just to get a sense of where you're at and you cycle if you haven't had one yet. And if they if it starts to resume, that's easy, OK?

09:20:36:22 - 09:20:20:06
Unknown
Even if you don't, even if your cycle day eight or nine knowing your ovaries, they may not start making any real quick. So I can. Still, when you're ready to move forward again, do an ultrasound, a little blood work, and if you're ready to start your letrozole and you're good to go, look, I kind of figured that

09:20:20:06 - 09:20:07:02
Unknown
during our conversations as well of doubt, I'm like, You've got to look at it first time out. It happened back in time. It happened, you know? Yeah. Just to get you over. Got to get you over. What I said earlier was just the medical tourism that's up.

09:20:05:11 - 09:19:37:02
Unknown
I would I would. I would continue to use the instead. All right. This is my pleasure. Yeah, out here. This helps. Good. Good. Good, good. Good. You both move about. It's great. Sorry under the circumstances, but you guys stay in touch.

09:19:37:02 - 09:14:44:27
Unknown
Let me know. Of course. What? Yeah. I don't know what you know, right? For the next. Oh, nothing. Nothing, nothing to do with the soap. Oh. Somebody. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. That was one of our.